“Why doesn’t my husband / wife like my cat?” It’s a question that many cat owners can’t wait to ask. The ruthless answer is: cats have their own character and are not afraid to express their opinion about a person. They are also not afraid to hurt the feelings of us humans.

Which people especially love cats – is the person feeding them? Or the one that gives them the most attention? Both are possible, but who a cat ultimately likes and which people he avoids is ultimately individual and almost unpredictable.

Cats often seem to prefer people who make them feel safe. They are people around whom they feel so safe that they can relax and fall into a deep sleep.

Sleeping together in a bed is therefore a decisive factor for many cats to ensure a secure bond with their owner.

Do cats need a leader?

Pack animals are known to choose a leader within the group and follow him. Cats, on the other hand, hunt alone, which is why it was previously believed that they must be hardened loners.

When cats live together in groups, females in particular show great solidarity with each other. They take care of raising offspring together or defend each other from a hostile hangover. There is more on this exciting topic in the article “Kisses of the hands” and brotherhoods of cats: 6 rituals that cats only take care of in packs.

Many young kittens experience separation trauma

While relationships with strangers are often good only as long as there is enough food for everyone, the relationship with mother and siblings in cats usually lasts for a lifetime. Nowadays, however, kittens are often placed as early as eight weeks or even earlier.

Cats with a strong need to bond with someone special were often separated from their mothers and siblings too early. This experience was formative for them and is why many need life-long safety and protection.

As a loving cat owner, we naturally want to meet this need of our pets. It works best when we’re also your favorite person at the same time.

Safety and security: here’s how to become a cat’s confidant – 5 tips:

1. Develop a sense of their moods

Cats are known to have fluctuating moods: one moment cats want to be stroked behind the ear, the next angrily they slap away the hand that they have just been stroked lovingly.

What cats dislike at all is being pressured. They want what they want, but only if they really want it themselves.

Trying to force a cat’s will is futile. Anyone who can accept it has a plus point with moody velvet paws. There is more about this in the article Understanding the language of cats: the 16 most important words

2. Cats love reserved personalities

Many cats find loud and lively characters intimidating and tend to stay away from them. Therefore you should always treat a strange cat with respect and not touch him suddenly, but give him time before making contact on his own.

It works best by squatting down, luring the cat in and letting it sniff your hand. The ice is often broken quickly and many cats rub their heads on their hand the next moment – a first sign of trust.

Even when dealing with our cats on a daily basis, we should take back ourselves and our desires and instead let the animal decide: does it want contact, or is it quiet? If you can look closely, you will see the difference.

3. Share your bed with your cat

We have already talked about it above: it can be useful for a good bond with cats if we allow them to sleep in bed with us.

Cats are extremely vulnerable, especially when they sleep. In nature they must therefore always be on the alert. A danger can arise at any time and even the smallest noise is enough to bring the mini tiger from 0 to 180.

How much more relaxed are cats when a familiar person watches over their sleep?

4. Love passes through the stomach

“Love goes through the stomach” is not an old-fashioned saying, but rather a reality for cats and their owners. If cats like people and can go out, they may occasionally bring small gifts with them – in the case of cats, these are small animals that have been killed, such as mice or birds.

By the way, if your cat doesn’t like your partner, taking control of the feeding process can help – many cats develop positive relationships with the person who feeds them regularly.

5. Give it time

Cats have individual personalities. When a cat is new to the home, it can take some time to familiarize itself with the new environment and the people who inhabit it.

So: give your cat time! Trust must grow and cannot be forced.

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